Day 222 (Tough Love)

Mood: Chilled out.

Mode: Procrastinating

Thoughts: Random post..

Apart from International Women’s Day which has already passed, South Africa has its own National Women’s Day which happens to be today. Truth be told, the most important role played by women today is as our mothers. If you ask me, it seems like all black mothers went to the same school and came out with the same hardcore, disciplinarian, no-nonsense, school of hard knocks approach to raising children: sons and daughters alike. Regardless of whether you were raised by a single mother (like I was) or by both parents, the role played by your black mother in instilling values and teaching right from wrong (the hard way, if necessary) is the reason we grow up to be the men and women we are today.

That being said, you know you have a black mother if:

1. You`ve ever been called from downstairs, upstairs, the back of the house,or from the front of the house to fix her a glass of ice water, get her,the remote control, or change the channel

2. You`ve ever been hit with an extension cord, a switch or the nearest shoe or object

3. You`ve ever had to pick your own switch or belt, and she sent you back if the switch or belt you got was to small

4. You`ve ever been hit in the head or knuckles with a hairbursh or comb

5. You`ve been told to “Shut Up or I`ll give you something to cry about” while she beats you with a belt-pronouncing every syllable —“Didn`t —I– tell —- you — not— to — do —that — *!*!$? — no — more?

6. You were scared to go home wen you got a bad report card

7. You were never “on punishment” just got whippins str8 out of the bathroom shower

8. You`ve ever been pinched for going to sleep in church

9. She made you participate in every church activity (choir, Jr. Usher>>Board Easter play, Christmas play, etc.)

10. When you ask her for something, her response is…”You got a job?” or “Go get a job”

11. You`ve ever been beaten for something your brother or sister did, just because you were around.

12. You`ve ever been told to turn off the TV, get off the phone, or sit down and be quiet when it`s storming outside because the Lord was doing His work.

13. You`ve ever been hung up on…for calling her to collect you.

14. Friends, family and friends of the family try to keep you out of trouble because they know your mother and how she is

15. You would never even dare think of calling the child abuse hotline.

16. She has to pray to GOD..”Lord, please don`t let me hurt this child!!”>> Before she gives you a whippin

17. You would pick up something (sweeties and other nonsensical stuff that you’d NEVER use) in the supermarket she would give you “the look” and you’d put it right back!

18. When you wanted something a common reply was “we have got it/can make it at home”

19. Swearing would get you killed a few white friends did it

20. If you did or said something stupid a common response was “who do you think I am? do I look like your friend!?”

21. Her cooking was the best beaten only by grannys

22. She would say things like: “I brought you into this world, I can take you out of it ….”!

23. You want to hide your self under a rock as soon she starts going off on managers, waiters, shop attendants and anyone in her path.

24. Her definition of a giving your a haircut was vigourously shaving all your hair off.

25. If you complained of headaches or stomaches, she would first tell you to drink water and lie down. It will go away.

26. Certain teachers in the school office are scared of her.

27. You’ve never been grounded? just beaten

28. Sometimes the silent glare/ death stare…. would say it all………. no words necessary!

=========X========

I know most of you can relate to this post and I’m sure there are plenty of other things I forgot to mention that remind you of the way our mothers raised us back in the day. Feel free to share them.

God bless our beautiful black mothers.

———

Now playing: Raheem DeVaughn – Woman

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3 thoughts on “Day 222 (Tough Love)

  1. Nice pick – love that ‘Woman’ joint.

    And that one about the report card is nothing but truth. I’d go to the post office to get the mail, see that one letter with the report card and sh*t my pants.

  2. You’re bed must be made with perfect hospital corners or else refer to number 28 and if that doesnt work, refer to number 5! Great post!

  3. I so totally got thrown for the nearest random object numerous times. plastic hangers, hair brushes, combs … no wonder i am such a pro at kati. I also had no hair till the age of eight = if i wasnt willing to sit still at the hairdressers then the scissors were brought out with a quickness!

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